Guys, it's me.

Who did this to you? Web. What's wrong with her? Ed III: Man, fuck this shit! [Both athletically jump away and disappear]. Do you celebrate the white man's goodness every day? Jul 1, 2018 - The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence! Uncle Ruckus: You mean we gon' let this African hooligan nigga go unpunished? Rummy: GOOD, NOW ALL SEE THE WEAPON!

They have THX. I mean, you like it here, don't you, Daddy? And I know some of you don't want to hear me say that word!

Tom Dubois: Huey, I got arrested! Huey Freeman: [at a party full of white people] Excuse me. Ya can't do it. Yes, that's brilliant. Well, I call y'all ALL hypocrites! Who's side are you on? Colonel Stinkmeaner: Bitch ass, faggot ass, punk ass, pussy ass, bitch ass *nigga*! Thugnificent: You can't be serious man. Jazmine Dubois: So you're not getting a divorce?

Riley: Game recognize game and you lookin' kinda unfamiliar right now.

Tell me what you know about that! What do you know about my vision?

Gin Rummy: I don't know you, motherf***er!

And your granddad? [the whole congregation starts beating each other. Ed Wuncler III: How was I supposed to know which bookstore to go into? Bushido Brown. Tom Dubois: [returns to normal in realization of what he's done] Oh, my god! It's a disease, Tom. It's so obvious. Riley: [out of breath from running to Gangstalicious' room] Niggas... Riley: Ahhh! Gin Rummy: Whoa, wait a minute now. Huey: Fun?

[slaps a black man] Black be gone! I'll hunt him down and feed him his testicles, *and* I'll do it in a jiffy. Huey Freeman: Hey, slow down.

I mean, scientifically speaking, has not hitting the bitch achieved the desired result? Oprah Winfrey has the power to lay waste an entire industry with a mere utterance! Riley Freeman: Hey, if people aren't mad at you, you're doing something wrong. Somebody out there is feelin' the spirit! Huey: Granddad, I do not sip tea with the enemy. Huey Freeman: I know who did the killing!

Uncle Ruckus: You can't compare a chocolate monkey like R. Kelly to Jerry Lee Lewis! W. J. Sollas?
Maybe someone saw something. Huey Freeman: Thanks for coming back, eventually. Riley Freeman: And I dare God to say somethin'!

If Michelangelo had been black, Jesus would look like George Jefferson!
Martin Luther King: Is this it? Huey Freeman: What makes your god any less made up than his? Huey: And you're gonna let him get away with that? Robert 'Granddad' Freeman: What happened last time? I'm gonna find me a white man and lie to him right now. Jesus was black, Ronald Reagan was the devil, and the government is lying about 9/11. Lady Esmeralda Gripenasty: [beating the life out of Riley] F*** yo' ass up like you stole somethin'! What is wrong with you! Really! There are those of you who say I'm wrong for hatin' niggas. I pretty much add anybody. Robert 'Granddad' Freeman: Yup, cheese. Ronald Wilson Reagan? At Sunday dinner, that was the first time you mentioned it. President Barack Obama: Unfortunately, there is no cure for the pandemic we now face.

[stands up]. I'm tired of this mother... [Tom, possessed by Stinkmeaner, kicks him in his chest]. I am forced to remain here, and express my extreme displeasure, while in no way threatening the life of the president and his beautiful monkey family. Martin Luther King Jr.: Will you ignorant n*ggers PLEASE shut the hell UP? Ed Wuncler III: I don't think 22 minutes is so bad.

Ed Wuncler III: Oh, somebody saw somethin' all right. [flashback to Riley who shoots Ed and falls from the building, he wore a body armor]. Ed Wuncler: The only joy I get from these parties is standing around telling mean-spirited jokes at other people's expense. Yo, I just seen this kid over there, right over there around the corner over there, and I know she ain't down with your team. Web. Well, start by askin' yourself 'How is my relationship with the white man?'

Huey: He believed it was his love of hatred that kept him going. The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence.

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